Need Help With Mental Stuff-Hubby's Deploying? Hi, I need help. My husband is deploying in about a week for 6 months. I'm currently taking Wellbutrin-bupropion, Citalopram, and Ativan every day. I'm diagnosed with PTSD, depression, OCD and anaxiety. I have 3 kids (3 years, 18 months, and 6 months) so I'll basically be a single mom the whole time my husband's deployed. My issue is with my medication. The antidepressants and regular anti anxiety meds are working ok, but the only thing that can seem to make me calm and not freaking out all the time is the ativan. He perscribed me 1mg every 8 hours or as needed, but It's getting to be where I have to take 3-4 at once just to be able to handle the kids alone. They're all in the typical age where I'm constantly running around busy and going insane because they're so much work. I don't even have time to go to the bathroom. If Idon't take my medication, I get horrible with major panic atttacks, crying eppisodes and rage every day. But I think that I'm starting to have to take more and more ativan each time because my body's getting used to the dosage or something. I'm going to the doctor tomorrow and I need to explain that I need my ativan without him thinking that I'm just in it and addicted. It's the only thing that's going to get me by when he's deployed. At my last apt the doctor said he didn't want me on Ativan because it's addicting and gave me this other stuff that just made me soooo sick. What should I do? Also, is there anything else that can help me deal with the anxiety and stress? I know exercise, taking kids t o park, blagblabla, but I'm serious, his last deployment, I just wanted to die and I don't want it to be hell again. I'm needing something that can calm me down, not think so much about him being in Iraq, and still be able to funcion and be a good mom for my kids. Any advice? PLEASE Helicreature, you have no idea what you're talking about. I have been clinically diagnosed with ocd, ptsd, depression, and anxiety. by psychiatrists. Now these problems that I have, and that many others have do usually get treated with medication and therapy. So I wouldn't call it "drugging myself up to my eyeballs" thank you very much. Also, I am very supportive of my husband and proud of him. I am a good mother and take darn good care of them while he's away. A simple question of other ways to cope for MYSELF isn't selfish. Not one bit. I was asking ways to make every day not seem like a year while he's gone. Because probably unlike you, I actually miss my husband while he's gone and count down the loooong days like there's no tomorrow. To know that there are other military wives that are as hard and cold as you is pretty sad. No support at all......... helicreature is probably one of the wives that sleeps with 20 other guys and gives her husband an std when he gets back.